Everyone has the same hair cut

For the past five years at least, there is a men's hairstyle that is as common today as the Mullet was in the 80s.

Shaved sides, longer on top, greased back.

We call it The Reverse Mullet: short back and sides, business at the top.

For women, it's been The Kardasian: dead flat, long, parted in the middle.

It comes with accessories: Turkish Moustache Eyebrows, Duck Lips, Mascara Til Tuesday, Black-Eye Shadow .

Women a little older or less daring will be drawn to the Bob, the Punk or the American Housewife.

The conformity to hairstyles reminds us of how much we resemble sheep, following each other around as if our lives depended on it.

A crowd of men and women out on the town, completely unknown to each other, will all have the same haircut, so that the venue looks like a cult convention.

Here we see Standard Kardashian Women on a date with Standard Man.

Acres of money, time, effort combined to acheive the individualistic Anyone look. Modern Barbie and Ken, shat out of the bowels of social conformity. The Current Trend Turd.

If the lights went out and everyone was evacuated, they'd end up outside with the wrong date.

Later on at the nightclub, they'd return from the bar or toilets and spend the rest of the night with someone else. Neither noticing the difference.

Here's another couple on a date at the same venue.

Here's another one...

If you look like everyone, you become anyone.

Men have only two other hair styles to choose from and two groups to follow: Bald and Hipster.

Almost all men over 35 are bald.

Perhaps not all men are being quietly attacked by a contagious Bald Virus, and they actually choose this "hair" style to channel their inner Action Hero from the silver screen.

Under 35, if you're a Hipster, you have to have a long beard and a man-bun.

That's it.

It's as though every city has only three barbers and one Kardashian hair stylist.

If they can afford it, women will complete the package boob face, fake boob boobs and matching arse.

Everyone is starting to look the same.


Just like almost all cars are white, black or grey, the people inside them have one of three hair styles.